Unexpected Surprises

Call me lame, hell, call me boring, but I just had one of the best times I've had in the past two months ... with my wife's grandmother.

Yes, singles, accept it now. After marriage, your best memories are made with a 72-year old woman while sitting in her ill-lit living room watching continual episodes of Bob Barker and "The Price is Right" in the background. (I was like 3 out of 4 on the showcase showdowns -- BAM!)

Hanging out with a grandmother is kinda like staying at a five-star hotel resort. Upon arrival, we were presented with fresh-out-of-the-oven chocolate and pecan cookies, our choice of shrimp, pork chops, or baked chicken entrees, and freshly laundered sheets, complete with home-made decorative quilts (all compliments of the resort -- I'm kind of important). Hmm, now that I think about it, I could have saved so much money on our honeymoon.

I also discovered that grandmothers have telepathic abilities. There were several instances when I thought about being thirsty, and bottles of water magically appeared on the light stand next to me. (Consequently, I tried my hardest not to wish death on her incessantly yapping chihuahua.)

I have to be fair to myself though, my wife's grandmother isn't any typical old grandmother. When she announced that she would like to take us out to lunch, I started gearing up for the nearest Dairy Queen and perhaps a late excursion to the local Bingo. However, to my surprise, she brought us to one of her favorite local restaurants, which just so happened to be a Thai Restaurant. (You heard me correctly, Thai.)

Now, I don't know about you, but my grandmother would launch an avalanche of 20 Questions at the mere mention of the word "Thai," making me inevitably regret suggesting something "so provocative" in the first place.

So, after many pleasant surprises, subsequent amazing meals, and just plain ole' grandmotherly tender love and care, my wife's grandmother bid us on our way (stuffing our pockets with all the sweets you could imagine. I think I may still have some chocolate mints if you're interested ;).

Moral of the story? Visit your grandmother. You get lots of crap for free, and you get meals that can tide you over for a week.

Just kidding! There's just something about going down memory lane with someone of that wisdom that sets everything today into perspective. It's a very enlightening experience, and a surprisingly fun one as well.

(But seriously, you get lots of free stuff.)